All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize