you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I have tasted many bathrooms
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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