If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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