I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize