is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize