What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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