I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
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that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
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He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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