i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
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There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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