you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize