have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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