Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
