Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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