Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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