At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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