I wish I could teleport
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Watching her eat just hurts me
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
The air taste purple.
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