I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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