i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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