with your own penis?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
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He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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