im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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