she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
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