After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
This is the high leading the old right now
Every concussion has its silver lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We need a shit load of segways right now
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize