Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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