i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize