So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize