addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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