Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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