New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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