You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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