I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize