Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i came on her dog
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
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