I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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