is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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