Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize