do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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