out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize