He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
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