I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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