It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize