spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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