On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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