hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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