Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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