She's JV to your varsity
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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