i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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