i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize