so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
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Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
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What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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