yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize