Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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