Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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