thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize